Hey, did you guys know that the “Jimmy” in Jimmy Carter is short for Jimothy? It’s an old Southern name you don’t hear much anymore.
Little-Known Fact: The missing 18 minutes of the Watergate Tapes are just Richard Nixon trying to play “Smoke On The Water” on his guitar.
- Scott Boxenbaum
ETA: That’s the face he made when he was laying down some hot riffs.
What most journalists and historians will fail to tell you is that Ronald Reagan gave himself the nickname “The Great Communicator.” He then informed his staff of his new nickname via memo. So, in case you were wondering what kind of dick gives himself his own nickname, this is it.
Few people know that the “B.” in “President Rutherford B. Hayes” stood for “Bag of Dicks.”
Before the invention of baseball, men used former Presidents to brag about their sexual conquests with women. Reaching underneath a woman’s brassiere was known as “Tickling The Tafts,” an homage to the largest US president ever, William Howard Taft, who sported very robust breasts. Kissing a woman was dubbed “The Old Thomas J” because a man was said to be “flaunting his sexual independence.” Oral sex was known as “Washington’s Smile” in reference to George’s wooden teeth. Fornication with a woman was the “Harrison Special” because, much like William Henry Harrison’s time in office, the sex usually didn’t last very long.
Not long after the birth of baseball, men moved on to the “bases” system of sexual reference still popular today. The baseball bat also played an important role in those days for it was the weapon of choice for fathers looking to seek retribution on men bragging about humping their daughter.
- Chris Illuminati writes stuff just because it can’t stay in his head. It’s for his own safety.
Check out the many articles and books, yes BOOKS!, he’s written here:
In the early days, a “presidential exploratory committee” was actually an initiation test that sent the candidate and his closest adviser to middle of the Amazon rain forest, alone, with no supplies
If the duo managed to survive and make it back to civilization, said candidate would be allowed to run for President of the United States.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt was the last candidate to successfully complete the exploratory committee trial.
Roosevelt though nearly died after stumbling into a poison dart frog nest, which left him paralyzed from the waist down. He later when on to claim the paralysis was a result of polio, so not to compromise the presidential exploratory process.
-Sent in by Jarod Ballentine